Monday, February 16, 2009

Good decisions usually = hard decisions.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the decisions I make.
What do people think when they see me?
Do they see a man of integrity, or just a goofy kid with a youtube account?
Every action I take affects how others visualize me.
This isn't to say that everyone's opinions of me are what's important.
But certainly, I should be living up to a specific standard.
If I'm not meeting that standard, then I need to rethink my decision making process.
Specifically speaking, my Christian lifestyle hasn't been apparent the way I'd like it to be.
I feel a bit constricted in that aspect.
Youtube has been a haven for people like TheAmazingAtheist, who spew hate at others just for choosing to live a different lifestyle than them.
However, according to my respective faith, those of us who are persecuted for the name of Jesus are blessed.
This isn't to say, "Go search for persecution, as to receive blessing."
It simply means that if you stick to your guns, when push comes to shove, and show where you stand, you will be blessed for doing so.
So why do I hold this cowardice when it comes to standing firm in who I am and who I choose to follow?
Is it the fear of rejection, or the innate defensive reaction to attack?
I haven't the slightest.
Still, in the coming weeks, I'm going to try and make my true-self more apparent to those around me, instead of compromising my values for the sake of conforming.

I hope everyone will respect that choice.



  1. I'm most certain that everyone will respect that choice. Or at least your friends and other... sane people will.

    I know what you mean. I have an automatic defense up when people ask me If I'm Christian. I always tend to say, "I'm Christian, but..." just because I know, or assume rather, that they will have a whole set of preconceived notions about me based on that label.

  2. Great post, I feel the same. (And the comment above is a great observation; I need to stop making excuses for believing what I do)

  3. This is an incredibly inspiring post to me. Recently, I find myself feeling jealous (wee bit ironc) of the Christian people I know and/or come across. They're ability to have such a deep faith in something (ie god and Jesus) that they would essetially devote their whole life to it, astounds me. I want to find something that I can have that much faith in and believe with such conviction.