They all went to the beach today.
My mom said, "You'll regret not going."
I lied and said I wouldn't.
I stayed home and made bad decisions.
Eating, watching, lounging, dieing.
I made up things.
"I don't like the sand."
"The water is cold this time of year."
"Too many people for me."
I love sand.
Cold water is refreshing.
People give me joy.
Because the truth makes me looks stupid.
I can't explain it to anyone.
And I'm tired of hearing that they all have the answer.
It assumes I AM stupid.
Like I haven't thought about it day in and day out.
Trying to figure out the answer.
Desperately searching for the truth.
As if the three words would fix my problem.
"Get over it."
I'll do that.
It's not so simple.
So I lie.
Even though I don't want to.